Mountain Goats :: No Children
I spent the past three weeks losing the battle to tonsillitis, intestinal bugs, and strep throat. It was AWESOME (read: depressing, humbling, painful). Much of this sicko time was spent laying on my back in my apartment where I live alone in a country far away from family, contemplating the frailty of humans (me in particular), the smog of Bogotá, and the wack-job reasoning behind Colombian medicine. I couldn’t walk more than a block and wanted to puke most of the time. I couldn’t go up stairs without stopping every third stair to curse the mega germs that have leveled me off and on for the past six months.
Then, on a Tuesday night, I got flea bites all over my ass and my ankles in cute swirly patterns. I woke up from my fitful, barely breathable sleep for an attack of the itchies. I couldn’t swallow, walk, eat, or see people for fear of contamination, so by the time my skin was also attacking me, I decided to take the hint and started laughing at the all the cumulated self-pity I had going for me. I realized that I was so ridiculously pathetic that I ought to at least find a little humor in the fact that I wanted to cut off my feet and my bum. Silly fleas.
It’s like the time I was sick at work in Rogers Park. I was stressed out, feeling down, and had a fever so I decided to take the Clark bus home and sit at my house to fully feel sorry for myself. So I took my pouty self out to the snowy street where immediately a divinely-inspired bird shit on my shoulder. Like a huge wad of bird poo all over my winter jacket and all I could think was, “oh, you’re so right. I’m being ridiculous…and that’s hilarious.” Leave it the wondrous intelligence of this dunkin donut-fed, cow-shaped pigeon to put me in my place.
That’s what John Darnielle does in this song, in my opinion. Who knows, maybe he thinks differently and is still taking himself seriously, but seems to me he had divorce strep throat and the break-up pigeon shat on him. But seriously, how funny is it when you want to rip out your heart and throw it at the one who hurt you? How can you not laugh when everything sucks? Sometimes it’s glorious to feel so bad.
No Children (3.9MB MP3)
Mountain Goats (homepage)
vj said on monday, august 18th, 2008
tina said on thursday, august 21st, 2008
I’m sure you will all be pleased to know that that’s wombat he’s holding. I had to go look it up. I was deeply disturbed by not knowing.
Katy said on thursday, august 21st, 2008
I thought it was a Larry Temelko! Man, I am no good with the cute creature nomenclature.
Oh man, Alison! I hope you’re coming around…Ana and I worry aloud about you every other week. Now we’re just going to have to send you a care package of Cipro, hydro cortisone, and hard-core painkillers. As long as you still have the physical ability to laugh, Pobrecita!